The word “calling” carries weight for those in ministry. It implies purpose, direction, and a life spent in service to others. But sometimes, the beauty of that calling gets buried under an avalanche of unspoken rules, internal pressure, and the weird guilt of never doing “enough.” There is always one more donor who just needs fifteen minutes, one more employee who needs extra attention during their rough season, one more event to put on that could be the tipping point for amazing opportunities for ministry…
It makes sense to keep giving ourselves to these things, right? We answer the question: “How are you?” with the response: “Busy, but with all good things!”
But the truth is, while ministry is a gift, it can also become a trap as we run to and from so many things that we begin to run on fumes.
The Pressure to Be Everything
I don’t have to tell you, you know ministry means a lot more than your job description implies. You are a teacher, administrator, researcher, tech support, conflict resolver, guide, and often therapist—all in one week. Add to that late-night hospital calls, board politics, budget constraints, and the occasional anonymous complaint letter, and you have a recipe for emotional overload.
Many ministry leaders share with me how they feel like saying “no” feels like failing God or failing those they lead. Let’s look at the subtle but powerful lie at work: If I don’t show up, something will fall apart. Maybe someone will fall apart.
But that’s not calling. That’s co-dependence to your ministry dressed in spiritual clothes.
Dr. Ruth Haley Barton, author of Strengthening the Soul of Your Leadership, puts it clearly:
“Truly, the best thing any of us have to bring to leadership is our own transforming selves.” The soul of the leader must be well-cared for if we are to care well for others.”
Ministry and the Ripping Backpack
Think of your calling like a backpack. It’s filled with God-given responsibilities—teaching, strategy, compassion, leadership. But somewhere along the way, other people start tossing their expectations into your pack. Over time, you start carrying things that were never yours to hold. And then the pack begins to rip— just a little bit at first. You hardly even notice it.
And then the hole grows. Signs you may be carrying other people’s expectations in ministry include:
- Saying “yes” reflexively, then regretting or resenting it later.
- Feeling like rest must be earned.
- Living like your worth is tied to productivity.
- Feeling emotionally responsible for people’s spiritual outcomes.
Reclaiming the Real Calling
It’s worth asking: What did God actually call you to do, and what have you added?
In Mark 1:35–38, Jesus walks away from a crowd that still wants healing. He says, “Let us go somewhere else—to the nearby villages—so I can preach there also. That is why I have come” (NIV). Jesus doesn’t stay where people still have needs. He does not live reactively. You are challenged to do the same.
Steps Toward Freedom
Here are some ways to loosen the hamster wheel’s grip on you and refocus your view of ministry:
- Name the Expectations
Write down what you believe people expect of you. Then, prayerfully ask which ones are for you to pick up and which ones are driven by fear. - Jesus’ Moves Towards Calling
Reflect on the passages of Jesus napping, or leaving a place unexpected. Notice how this causes confusion and anger not just for the crowd, but even in his followers. - Set Sacred Boundaries
Sabbath isn’t selfish—it’s obedience. Protect your time off. Limit after-hours responses. Trust that God works even when you rest. - Find an Outside Accountability Partner
Meet regularly with a trusted friend, counselor, or spiritual director who can help you notice when you’re veering into unhealthy behavior. - Normalize Rest and Limits from the Front
Talk about your own boundaries with your community. Help shape a culture where healthy limits are seen as faithfulness, not failure.
The Grace to Be Human
At its core, operating from an unhealthy pace in ministry often comes from a good place—a desire to serve well, love deeply, and reflect Christ. But when anything but Jesus becomes the engine, things start to unravel. You are not measured by how many events you attend, emails you answer, or crises you resolve. You are measured by faithfulness to God alone—and faithfulness includes caring for the body God gave you.
So let this be your permission slip to take off the heavy backpack. It was never yours to carry.